Drenched In My Pain
by BeautifulDisaster88
Summary: Ryan Evans has a seeminly perfect life. He's cute, popular, and talanted. But behind closed doors, his fairy tale life is anything but. And things show no sign of improvment. Rated M for...Well, just about everything.
1. Chapter 1

A handsome, blue-eyed teen walked the halls of East High during lunch period on a Tuesday afternoon. He had to get out of that cafeteria; there's only so many of Sharpay's hissyfits a person can take. And he had to listen to her incessant whining more than anyone at school. He lived with her, after all.

On one hand, he loved Sharpay. She was his sister, of course he loved her. Sometimes he felt like she was the only person who could even begin to understand what he was going through. After all, she was experiencing some of it, too. And with the turmoil surrounding his parents, having someone he could talk to was a blessing.

On the other hand, Sharpay could be aggressive, cold-hearted, and mean. She bossed him around, and even thought she could tell him who he was allowed to be friends with. She was cruel, manipulative, and…his sister, whom he loved. He had to stop thinking like this. Sharpay was not the enemy.

A group of girls walked by, looking and smiling at him. He flashed them his most charming smile. They giggled and ran off. When they look at Ryan Evans, they see exactly what everyone else does. A talented, good-looking, popular boy who any guy would want to be and any girl would want to be with. When Ryan Evans looks at Ryan Evans, he sees a boy who deserves all of the pain he's suffering. Those girls didn't know what went on in his home life. They had no idea of the thousands of worries and fears that streamed constantly through his young mind. They swooned over him, completely oblivious to the emotional damage that he hid so well.

But eventually, all pain, even if it's been bottled up inside for years, needs to come out. Today was one of the days it would. He found an empty classroom, closed the door, and fell to the ground, weeping.

It was too much; he had too much to deal with. The cruelty of his parents, his grandfather's ailment…and something was wrong with Sharpay, she'd been acting so strange lately. She insisted she was fine, but Ryan knew better.

Sometimes he felt useless, like a nuisance who offered nothing positive to the world. Like a mistake of God. He knew nearly everyone in his life would be better without him. He wished he could disappear, leaving everyone he loved happier and better off in his absence.

A bell rings, and Ryan is forced out of his melancholy. He gathered his items, wiped his face, and reentered his false reality. He was once again the Ryan that everyone at East High knew him as. He walked to class, flaunting his perfect smile and radiating false confidence.


	2. Chapter 2

Tuesday night was Salsa practice. Out of all the classes and lessons his parents forced him to take, Salsa was by far Ryan's favorite. This was partly due, as guilty as he felt at admitting it, to the absence of Sharpay, who quit Salsa over a year ago after having a falling out with the instructor. This minor setback forced him into getting a new partner, which he found to be an enjoyable change. Salsa was an escape for him; he got lost in the movement, was filled with the music, and, for a few hours, forgot about everything that was bothering him.

Dancing with his partner, Nicette, was an entirely different experience than dancing with his sister; it was so much more intimate, so natural, and so…sensual. Chivalry lived in dance; and she, unlike Sharpay, was submissive to every move he made. It made him feel powerful, and for once, completely in control.

They were to perform in a recital in two weeks, and their instructor, Emiliano, was extra hard on them.

"You're half a count slow!"

"That under-arm turn was pathetic! Start over."

"If the cross-body turn is off, the next four steps are off! Try again."

Criticisms poured off his tongue with a thick accent and a thoroughly annoyed tone. But that just made Ryan work harder; he would not accept anything less than perfection from himself.

They repeated the dance over and over again, improving slightly each time. Ryan disappeared into the dance and became entirely focused on Nicette. It was an exhilarating and deeply sexual experience. His senses were heightened; he became acutely aware of every movement, every touch. His heart leapt each time his fingertips brushed against her soft, smooth skin. He was scarcely able to smell a hint of her sweet, sumptuous perfume on her neck, leaving him craving more. His arms wrapped tightly around her waist, his hand at her hip, embracing the delicate velvet of her dress. She pressed her body firmly to his, her hips tight against him, awakening a monster inside of him, and he bit down on his lip to suppress it. Her blue eyes locked seductively onto his as her red, glossy lips curled into a taunting smile. How he longed to lean into those lips, tangle his hands into that blonde hair, and force his tongue into her tender, perfectly formed mouth...to do even more…

And then, the dance was over. His breathing was heavy, and he was overflowing with a feeling of ecstasy. He looked to his partner, his sexual interest in her gone. It was the dance that turned him on; the rhythmic beating of their bodies, the suggestive movement, the music pulsing through his veins. He smiled at Nicette. Every time they danced, she offered him something Sharpay never could: an escape.

When practice ended, Ryan fell back into his depression. He got changed, climbed into his polished, candy-apple red convertible, and drove home, wondering what ridiculous argument he'd walk into this time.


End file.
